The Twits Give Me the Shits
 

Twits Karaoke @ the Greyhound

2/9/2001

"If you're trying to pick up a woman, don't masturbate in front of her!"

Fresh from their loss in the charity football match for the Sacred Heart Mission, The Twits came on stage dressed in a Father's Day theme -
Fred was wearing a dressing gown, slippers and smoking a pipe, the drummer was wearing a nappy (I thought they all did?) and the other band members were in various stages on undress (those purple bike shorts on the lead singer let you see things you would rather not look at!)

GREAT LIVE BAND!

Best Songs (with the actual titles):
She's a bloke
What the fuck are you wearing?
(Dedicated to all the Dads with bad fashion sense.)
POO
GET FUCKED CUNT
A song dedicated to Fleur in the audience
Wanking in a public lavatory
Born on the back of a truck
(With the chorus:
VIOLET CRUMBLE!
She made us break it in four.
VIOLET CRUMBLE!
The best pieces fell on the floor.)

Other Highlights/Lowlights:

  • The naked and bleeding bass player (he jumped off the stage and fell off the amp.)
  • Fred Negro screwing around (as always.)
  • Really bad jokes:
"Father?"
"Yes Son."
"What's that split between Mum's legs?"
"You see son, she was in the shed and she fell on the axe, it's an axe wound."
"Jeez. Got her right in the cunt then."

KARAOKE

Best singers:

  • Mad bastard Gonzo
  • Fleur (I wish Fred and Steve would quit with the tampon jokes though, they are never funny.)
  • Georgie B (Who will not sing - regardless of what song he does.)
  • Fred's Ted Murly tribute.