The Twits Give Me the Shits
 

Beer Sandwich

(Fred Negro, Jason 'Evo' Evans)

Well the pub we used to drink at, it just closed down,
They whacked a coat of paint on it and charge more for a brown,
Well my favourite Rock'n'Roll hole, has become a restaurant,
Well I don't want to eat I want to rock out, as is my wont

Chorus
I want a beer sandwich,
I don't want to have dinner,
I want beer pissing out of my head,
I'll have a beer sandwich,
O-oooh, hold the bread
hold the bread...
hold the bread...

Well folks used to play and they used to say, "Got 20c?"
Now it's garlic prawns and red, red wine, you'd think they'd have more sense
The only food you used to see around here was regurgitated on the toilet seat
Now the code is don't rock'n'roll, don't get pissed, justeat this!

Chorus

(in French accent - Fred usually improvises this part live)
Perhaps Madame and Monsieur would be wanting the menu?
Perhaps I could give you the suggestions?
Perhaps the rack-o-tentacle, perhaps a little bit of tote-tolu?
Perhaps the black assassin's bottle?
Perhaps the little bitty pizzas?
Perhaps a bit of beujeillas?
For the main course of course, I suggest fine foxy fox?

Well we used to eat after a gig, get a pizza from next door,
Give me rock'n'roll, fuck this shit, I'd rather eat maggots from a dead whore
Well the way we're going well all get FAT, but our rock'n'roll soul will get thin
I don't know why I'm carrying on, because they wouldn't let the Fuck Fucks in!

Chorus